Copyright 2005 Coco Fossland
Through the ups and downs of life, it can seem at times, as though the quality of our lives is dependent on the people, situations, and conditions of the world around us. Yet, to become the powerful creator of our lives, we must be willing to see beyond this short-sighted view of ourselves and our lives.
Whether we are aware of it or not, the choice each of us is constantly making is the choice of picking between heaven or hell. The truth is, every moment, each of us decides. There is no outside force that decides. We choose it every moment.
The comedy is that even though we have the choice -- usually people pick the experience of hell over heaven.
To see whether you are currently living in heaven or hell, look around your life. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being hell and 10 being heaven, where would you rank your life?
This week, observe your thoughts and words.
How often and about what do you complain?
How often and about what are you disappointed?
At what frequency do you wish things could be different than they are?
How often are others letting you down and not meeting your expectations?
How often are you letting yourself down?
Focusing on complaints, disappointments, should be's, and unmet expectations creates the illusion of hell.
To have a life a bliss, you must be willing to challenge the assumption that the root of our dissatisfaction is really about the complaints and unmet expectations that dribble out uncontrollably out of your mouth.
Step One: Clean up your thoughts and language.
Catch yourself before that same old complaint indomitably burps out of your mouth. Choose your language carefully.
Before you tell yourself, "I have to wash the dishes," notice that you really don't have to. Even if you're at gunpoint -- which I entirely doubt you are -- it's still a choice -- to do the dishes or not.
Adjust your language to be both more accurate and empowering. An example would be, "I choose to wash the dishes now rather than later, because I know how great it feels to walk into a clean kitchen." Step Two: See the real issue beneath the illusion.
The subject of your complaints and unmet expectations are a facade of the deeper issue that is really the culprit for your life feeling more like struggle and pain than joy and bliss.
The culprit lies inside choosing self-worth over self-hate.
Step Three: Expose underlying beliefs and assumptions.
How you make the choice between heaven or hell -- or self-worth and self-hate depends on your assumptions and beliefs of whether you feel worthy, good enough or deserving of happiness.
To take yourself from hell to heaven, you must consistently choose to find inner value and inner worth. To do this, you must be willing to become deeply aware of your Self. You must see what overshadows your feelings of worth, so you can send love, kindness and compassion to those places.
Otherwise, your experience of life will always be painful.
Step Four: Accept that you already live in and deserve heaven.
Much of our socializing has taught us to believe that "life is hard," and "you have to suffer," and "you must endure this life" to get the bliss of heaven in your next life.
Challenge these beliefs.
Rather than living this life trying to earn your way to heaven in the next, begin today and every day grounded in the assumption that not only are you are already worthy and deserving of heaven -- but you are already there. All you have to do is claim it.
Step Five: Illuminate your worthiness.
if you want to "go to heaven," it is your journey to illuminate your worthiness of bliss today. The amount of pain and struggle you feel in your life is inversely related to your feelings of worthiness. The more self-love and self-worth you have, the less the pain and struggle you will experience.
Every moment, you are the one who decides heaven or hell. When you decide that you are not worthy of heaven, by default you will experience hell, and thus so will be color of your life.
Step Six: Make self-love your #1 responsibility.
Self-love occurs when you recognize your value and worth. It becomes who you are, when you set your life in alignment with your inner wisdom the part of you who knows what is best for you.
Until you live according to inner law, you will consistently live in disappointment of yourself. This is the seed of self-hate. Living out of alignment with inner law, you will forever live with the sickening feeling that you aren't worthy of joy.
This is because you have failed at your most important responsibility: listening, honoring, and loving yourself.
Failing to live up to this most important responsibility manifests the creation of hell.
When you align with self-love, you reclaim your right to feel worthy of all the joy, love and wisdom in the universe.
I invite you to a new perspective of yourself and of life. Whether your life feels like heaven or hell is dependent on how much you love and cherish you.
When you become a master of self-love, you will see all things as loving and as an experience of heaven. You will no longer be stuck in the chains of fear and pain, because you have the one thing your spirit needs most: your love.
When you feel pain and struggle, sift through the rubble of "the story" you are telling yourself for why your situation shouldn't be, and seek out the part of you that feels unworthy or unloved. Then, look that wounded part of yourself in the eye, and ask them what they need to feel loved. Whatever it is, give it to yourself, and re-align with the transforming powers of self-love.
Each time you make this choice, notice how your perception of yourself and your life changes. Watch as you step from hell into heaven.
About Coco Fossland
The author of the forthcoming book, The Power of Trust: Trust Yourself, Transform Your World, Coco Fossland is a nationally recognized expert in personal transformation, self-empowerment and self-healing. Blending a decade of technology and strategy consulting with her expertise in self-trust transformation, Coco's business is focused on supporting people passionate about creating businesses that make a difference in the world. She helps her clients fuse their higher path with their businesses, creating institutions and organizations that profoundly impact the world one person at a time. Please visit www.cocofossland.com for more info.